I know you posted this awhile ago, but I'd like to say I think it's a fine effort. I didn't have any trouble reading the dialogue balloons, but I used to read a lot of Manga. The first girl's ear stripe disappeared in the second panel, but not hard to put it back in right? It helps identify her. Careful not capitalizing the first letters of your sentences, it's a little disruptive. I'm sure you already caught the "...are meeting to my demands..." mistake. But these are nice pages, I wish I were at your level already.
Are you drawing for practice or trying to get published in a fanzine or other book? I think you have real talent that just needs experience and practice, the elements of manga art are all present here, and you will just keep getting better in time:)
Did you post your complete story anywhere? I'd love to read it.
I just want to say that I love the work you have put into this ( its a style I like..anthros and all) . I don't think I'm the best person to be giving advice but I will say this, I notice that you talk about limited resources... well a goid thing to do while you wait to get them is to take each character and just start sketching them in different positions and with different expressions. What you should find when your done is a start at consistency in the characters looks. Really think about distinguishing characteristics like eye shape, markings and so forth that make your characters stand out from one another and give you a basis for being consistent.it helped me a ton. Especially when you don't draw a character for a long time, it takes awhile to get back to making them look right. :)
Hi. Just wanted to agree with the other comments here to put some more design & layout consideration to the lettering. Stuff like centering the text in the balloons, keeping consistent space between lines of text, etc. The negative space around the text in the balloon is just as much a design element as the rest of the art on the page. As long as your audience knows what format you're using, it shouldn't matter if it's designed to be read left-to-right or right-to-left, as long as it's consistent. If the text needs to be read in a certain order, but the action in the panel draws the reader's eyes a different way, that's what causes problems.
I'm going to copy some URL links I had posted to another art critique elsewhere on the forums. The sites give lettering advice based on American style comics (that is, read left-to-right, and with word balloons typically wider than they are tall) but it's useful advice that should be easily adaptable to manga-style lettering.
BalloonTales.com, the free resource forum of the Comicraft lettering studio (which also sells lettering fonts). They have a glossary of lettering terms, a guide to the process of lettering, and a lot of computer tips on how to create specific lettering effects.
"Comic Book Grammar and Tradition", an article by the Blambot.com lettering studio. The site has some fonts for sale too, but also has dozens of free comic book lettering fonts for download.
Hi. Just wanted to agree with the other comments here to put some more design & layout consideration to the lettering. Stuff like centering the text in the balloons, keeping consistent space between lines of text, etc. The negative space around the text in the balloon is just as much a design element as the rest of the art on the page.
As long as your audience knows what format you're using, it shouldn't matter if it's designed to be read left-to-right or right-to-left, as long as it's consistent. If the text needs to be read in a certain order, but the action in the panel draws the reader's eyes a different way, that's what causes problems.
I'm going to copy some URL links I had posted to another art critique elsewhere on the forums. The sites give lettering advice based on American style comics (that is, read left-to-right, and with word balloons typically wider than they are tall) but it's useful advice that should be easily adaptable to manga-style lettering.
BalloonTales.com, the free resource forum of the Comicraft lettering studio (which also sells lettering fonts). They have a glossary of lettering terms, a guide to the process of lettering, and a lot of computer tips on how to create specific lettering effects.
"Comic Book Grammar and Tradition", an article by the Blambot.com lettering studio. The site has some fonts for sale too, but also has dozens of free comic book lettering fonts for download.
yeah, I have manga studio (just recently got it) and it actually has too many tones for me to look through, if I find a tone I like, I cant find it again due to having over 2,000 tones
and, it lags while loading the tones
Daniel Conner said:
it seems that you have some computer access, since you can post on here, etc. i'd say your best bet financially may be to get Manga Studio- the basic version runs for about 50 bucks- tho you can find it cheaper from some retailers. it has mroe tones than you will ever need and you can draw using the program. sometimes they have it at target.
also, do you have a wacom tablet? I'd look into that, too. since drawing with a mouse isn't really feasible. you can find one of those for maybe 100 or so. i realize that these can be expensive, but in the long run, i think you'll save money on other art supplies. many best buy stores have them, and some apple stores, do, too, let alone online retailers.
it seems that you have some computer access, since you can post on here, etc. i'd say your best bet financially may be to get Manga Studio- the basic version runs for about 50 bucks- tho you can find it cheaper from some retailers. it has mroe tones than you will ever need and you can draw using the program. sometimes they have it at target.
also, do you have a wacom tablet? I'd look into that, too. since drawing with a mouse isn't really feasible. you can find one of those for maybe 100 or so. i realize that these can be expensive, but in the long run, i think you'll save money on other art supplies. many best buy stores have them, and some apple stores, do, too, let alone online retailers.
its ok, and yeah, I been holding off on the manga until I get the tools I need, but stores such as AC Moore arent close to me at all, they are almost 30 miles away from me, and thanks for your comment ^_^
Brian D said:
I'm sort of jumping in on this midway, but wanted to say a few words. First and foremost, I think you have a great ambition as can be seen in your responses. As far as tools (pens) I can understand limited resources. However, compare that to wasted time. In other words, I think it would better suit you to "hold off' until you can get the tools that are going to make this a better looking end product. You can buy some strathmore paper and a decent set of pens from A.C. Moore (a local craft store in my area) or some place comparable for under $20. I think this MAJOR first step will go a long way towards a better, more professional result. Lastly, learning the basics of layout (for instance centering your lettering in the balloons) and keeping your characters consistant is all part of the trade. But I'm certain your dedication will show this over time. You get better over time. I'm sure Da Vinci's first drawings weren't instant masterpieces either. Have fun with it regardless and good luck.
kyle said:
thak you so much for your critique, I really wish I could actually work on the line thing, but since I;m down to one ink pen (with my limited resources), but yeah, Im working on my perspective as we speak, perspective is still a hard thing for me to grasp when drawing ^^;
Calvary Comics said:
The art is very amateurish, and the figures and perspective need a lot of work. Your surface linework needs much cleaning up, as it is inconsistent. Usually fatter lines are around forms in the foreground, and as objects recede in space, the outlines become progressively thinner. Additionally, your characters do not stay 'on model.' Animated cartoon studios, for instance, provide model sheets for their artists so they can see how the characters look from many different angles, in different body positions and facial expressions, and so they also know the relative heights of the characters (the last being an often overlooked item even amongst comics professionals).
thanks, Ive been trying my best to get the tones right, but I dont have much to show mostly because I had to stop due to my limited resources (such as pens)
good job finishing some pages! that's the main thing, right?
as far as manga, what i'm going to say is, study the manga you like and try to apply what you like from it.
your word bubbles are manga styled, try to letter like they do in current Viz books. fit the words in the shape of the bubbles.
you're getting a grip on your tones, so keep working on that. many are smooth with the shapes, and many fit with what you're toning- so keep going there, too. also, sometimes we think that the more different tones we use, the better- when instead it's good to make use of a few tones in different ways.
I'm sort of jumping in on this midway, but wanted to say a few words. First and foremost, I think you have a great ambition as can be seen in your responses. As far as tools (pens) I can understand limited resources. However, compare that to wasted time. In other words, I think it would better suit you to "hold off' until you can get the tools that are going to make this a better looking end product. You can buy some strathmore paper and a decent set of pens from A.C. Moore (a local craft store in my area) or some place comparable for under $20. I think this MAJOR first step will go a long way towards a better, more professional result. Lastly, learning the basics of layout (for instance centering your lettering in the balloons) and keeping your characters consistant is all part of the trade. But I'm certain your dedication will show this over time. You get better over time. I'm sure Da Vinci's first drawings weren't instant masterpieces either. Have fun with it regardless and good luck.
kyle said:
thak you so much for your critique, I really wish I could actually work on the line thing, but since I;m down to one ink pen (with my limited resources), but yeah, Im working on my perspective as we speak, perspective is still a hard thing for me to grasp when drawing ^^;
Calvary Comics said:
The art is very amateurish, and the figures and perspective need a lot of work. Your surface linework needs much cleaning up, as it is inconsistent. Usually fatter lines are around forms in the foreground, and as objects recede in space, the outlines become progressively thinner. Additionally, your characters do not stay 'on model.' Animated cartoon studios, for instance, provide model sheets for their artists so they can see how the characters look from many different angles, in different body positions and facial expressions, and so they also know the relative heights of the characters (the last being an often overlooked item even amongst comics professionals).
Replies
Hi Kyle,
I know you posted this awhile ago, but I'd like to say I think it's a fine effort. I didn't have any trouble reading the dialogue balloons, but I used to read a lot of Manga. The first girl's ear stripe disappeared in the second panel, but not hard to put it back in right? It helps identify her. Careful not capitalizing the first letters of your sentences, it's a little disruptive. I'm sure you already caught the "...are meeting to my demands..." mistake. But these are nice pages, I wish I were at your level already.
Are you drawing for practice or trying to get published in a fanzine or other book? I think you have real talent that just needs experience and practice, the elements of manga art are all present here, and you will just keep getting better in time:)
Did you post your complete story anywhere? I'd love to read it.
Gerry
Kevin Yong said:
As long as your audience knows what format you're using, it shouldn't matter if it's designed to be read left-to-right or right-to-left, as long as it's consistent. If the text needs to be read in a certain order, but the action in the panel draws the reader's eyes a different way, that's what causes problems.
I'm going to copy some URL links I had posted to another art critique elsewhere on the forums. The sites give lettering advice based on American style comics (that is, read left-to-right, and with word balloons typically wider than they are tall) but it's useful advice that should be easily adaptable to manga-style lettering.
BalloonTales.com, the free resource forum of the Comicraft lettering studio (which also sells lettering fonts). They have a glossary of lettering terms, a guide to the process of lettering, and a lot of computer tips on how to create specific lettering effects.
"Comic Book Grammar and Tradition", an article by the Blambot.com lettering studio. The site has some fonts for sale too, but also has dozens of free comic book lettering fonts for download.
and, it lags while loading the tones
Daniel Conner said:
also, do you have a wacom tablet? I'd look into that, too. since drawing with a mouse isn't really feasible. you can find one of those for maybe 100 or so. i realize that these can be expensive, but in the long run, i think you'll save money on other art supplies. many best buy stores have them, and some apple stores, do, too, let alone online retailers.
Brian D said:
as far as manga, what i'm going to say is, study the manga you like and try to apply what you like from it.
your word bubbles are manga styled, try to letter like they do in current Viz books. fit the words in the shape of the bubbles.
you're getting a grip on your tones, so keep working on that. many are smooth with the shapes, and many fit with what you're toning- so keep going there, too. also, sometimes we think that the more different tones we use, the better- when instead it's good to make use of a few tones in different ways.
kyle said:
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